These Are My Confessions

Being a mom has truly opened my eyes to the ugly that is dwelling in my heart. Everyday I strive to be an example to Jaxen of how to love, forgive, and live a life of kindness.

Being on this journey to better myself for the sake of him has really shown me some of my true colors. I mean for the most part I would say, and hope that others believe that I am a nice person, but there is always room for improvement no?

While reading Romans today, I was brought to a halt. You know how you read something that is trying to pierce your heart but you think "Who me? Haha, nah God I'm not like that!" Well I had one of those moments for sure.

Romans 2: 1-2 (MSG) 

Those people are on a dark spiral downward. But if you think that leaves you on the high ground where you can point your finger at others, think again. Every time you criticize someone, you condemn yourself. It takes one to know one. Judgmental criticism of others is a well-known way of escaping detection in your own crimes and misdemeanors. But God isnt so easily diverted. He sees right through all such smoke screens and holds you to what you've done. 

Hot dog, hot dog, hot diggity dog. 

Now I am pretty sure that unless you have never judged anyone a day in your life, this scripture hit you like it hit me.

If I am completely honest, I can be super judgmental. Thoughts of what other people do with their children, their lives, the way they conduct themselves, all fall right under my judgement meter on a daily basis.

"Oh I would never do that!"

"You would never catch me wearing that."

"How can she speak to her children that way?"

"I would never, I would never, I would never!!"

Everyone makes mistakes. We all have struggles and sin differently. So who am I, who are we, to judge others. Who am I to place myself on a high horse and look down on others? The last time I checked my name was Jo, not God. 

The bible says that every single time that I allow myself to judge others situations and circumstances, I am condemning myself. How would life look for all of us if we thought of our judgmental ways as not just a thought, or a simple statement made to one another, but as condemning ourselves?

If I could just remind myself of this daily, I am almost positive I would see a change in the way I think about others. 

"It takes one to know one." 

That line made me chuckle. Who knew that a catch phrase that I threw around as a kid was actually biblical, and a line that carries a lot of weight. Being completely transparent, I am sure that there is a little bit of me in everyone who I am so quickly to judge. My fingers barely wanted to type that. 

It can be hard to take your eyes off of others flaws and actually examine your own heart and your own life.

But God isnt so easily diverted. He sees right through all such smoke screens and holds you to what you've done. 

To some this may seem a little harsh, but when I read it, I instantly thought of grace. God's grace. You see it's just like a parent with their child. Because I love Jaxen so much, I am not going to allow him to do and act however he wants to. I am going to call him out and hold him accountable for his actions, because I want him to be the best that he can be, and I love the fact that God is the same way with us. 

I am learning every day to be a great wife, mom, follower of Christ, and although it is not easy, I am learning to look at the plank in my own eye before I so easily assess the plank in someone else's. 

I am completely guilty of being judgmental, but I am extremity grateful for this little reminder to get off of my horse and acknowledge that not only do I have junk, but the very junk that I am judging in others might very well be the same junk that is in me. 

Prayerfully this allowed you to open your eyes to the not so cute that lives inside of  you, and encouraged you to live a life of love. Let's try to take on this challenging task together, one day at a time.

xx,

Jo